Christmas week, I ran about the week before, getting everything ready for visitors, sorting things out for the kids, if I wasn't shopping, I was wrapping, if I wasn't doing that I was out with Mitch at one social event or another.
I loved being out, I hurt yeah, but I didn't care, I pushed through adding some alternative pain relief to my diet. I kept going right through to Christmas eve. My little one, who is a bit vulnerable right now, went off to his dad's. I worry about him so much when I can't see him, this might have been what pushed me over the edge, I don't know.
I did the things we normally do on Christmas morning, then that was it, my body just said no, no more moving, reaching, talking, listening, no more, just no. I'm used to this, this is my normal, but other people don't understand. ... "you were fine yesterday" No, I wasn't, but I'm very good at pretending I am!
This thing 'fibromyalgia' is unpredictable, because one day I can do things, even if they hurt, but the next day, or hour, or week I can not. I always try, but pure bloody minded will power isn't always enough.
Yesterday I was supposed to be hosting an open house kinda thing, in actual fact my partner had to go solo, I was huddled up in the lounge hurting, heating pads, tens machine, the lot... every pain easing device in my arsenal was in use.
At some point I decided float in the hot tub would be a good idea, it was....until I fell out of it arse over elbow!
So here I am, legs a multitude hues of blue, in a world of pain that I can't ease.
I think there should be enough recovery time in order to half kill myself celebratin the new year... all with a smile!
I don't fake being sick, I fake being well....
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